Over the years, I have learned that Satan is a great deceiver and we often forget he has been a deceiver since the time of Adam and Eve and he is truly good at what he does. No matter how strong our faith is, he will always try everything in his power to cause us doubt and fear. While God was telling me Deacon Hermon was the one for me, I found myself falling for the devils lies and was hearing him say, “You are a sinner, you are not good enough and who do you think you are?” And when we start believing the devil’s lies, doubt always enters our mind.
Sadly, I was beginning to doubt the decision Deacon Hermon and I made to get engaged. Not because I didn’t think Deacon Hermon was good enough for me, but because I didn’t think I was good enough for him. Deacons and Priests are regarded highly in our Tewahedo Orthodox faith and in our culture. The thought of being a Deacon or a Priest wife terrified me. I was asking myself, what in the world am I getting into? I had been accustomed to seeing a priest wife staying at home, wearing chiffon (traditional Eritrean dress) with netsela (traditional Eritrean shawl) and making boon (traditional Eritrean coffee) every morning. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind making boon, but I was a complete opposite of what was traditional. I loved my jeans and t-shirts and I preferred Folgers coffee with Coffee-Mate french vanilla creamer and occasionally, I loved my Starbucks White Chocolate Mocha.
I called Deacon Hermon immediately and told him we had to talk. He thought something had happened and he called me right back. I asked him,”Do you ever think you should marry a traditional girl from back home who will wear her chiffon and netsela around the house.” He laughed and laughed and laughed. Then he asked me, “Why?” I then told him I didn’t think I could give up my jeans and t-shirt. We then both started laughing. Talking to him was amazing, it always felt like we were best friends, because we truly had become best friends. We talked about anything and everything. He erased the doubt I had and reassured me by saying the sweetest words I had ever heard. He said, “You would be a terrible thing to lose.”
I thanked God for sending me such an amazing and wonderful guy, who truly respected and honored me. I also was so thankful that Deacon Hermon was different from the older habesha men that I had seen, who talk down to their wives and who used name calling as if it’s normal. To all my habesha sisters, who have experienced this or grew up around this type of behavior. Do not lose hope, the newer generation of habesha men are completely different. If a guy truly has the fear and love of God, he will always respect and honor you.
Feeling reassured and confident in the decision to get engaged, I had started the countdown to January 7th our Tewahedo Orthodox Christmas to share the good news with my parents.
to be continued…….